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BlackBoard Bistro- Laguna Beach, CA

8/11/2021

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Wow... the last one.

So I kept getting emails to renew my domain and premium access. Between moving back to Alabama, work week, rush week, and the start of school- I never got around to it. I logged back into it for shits and gigs, and mudgesbutter.com was met with 404 not found. My heart broke a little, but I thought I was ready to let go. Despite being in the south, I don't have as much butter as I thought I would have to rate, and my life got too busy to ever write about it. It was really expensive to renew it, and I didn't think it was worth it. I realized however, that I can't not say goodbye.

I think I'm gonna keep the blog, but it will just look different. I have been sending my family and friends little updates of my life, but this way I don't have to actually send out an email- they can just check here. 

I would like to give a big thank you to all of you. I have absolutely loved every second of your support and all the forms it took. I loved being called Mudge, I loved hearing/seeing your own butter reviews, and I've loved all your comments when I post a new update. 

I love my bread, I love my butter, but most of all I love my mudgesbutter.com. 

Xoxo, 
MJ

Salty- 4/5
- picked up all the other flavors really well

Creaminess- 5/5
Dense,but not sticking to the roof of my mouth

Softness- 3/5
- soft and airy like most whipped butter, but the salt beads were throwing off the texture. 

Spread- 4/5 

​16/20
1 Comment

South Africa Update #1

6/23/2021

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Hello friends and family! 

For a while now, I have wanted to send semi-regular updates about my life and everything I was doing! Second semester was incredibly busy between work, school, the sorority and socials. Now that I am in South Africa I found myself with a little more free time and with much more exciting updates to share!
I am mid way through my third week here in Cape Town, and I think it is going to be quite the feat to leave. 

I live with three girls: Bri from Texas but a senior at Ole Miss, Anna from Alabama and a recent graduate of Auburn University, and Lindsay from Illinois but a Junior at Mizzou. The roommate match makers did their job well as we all get along and have a great time hanging out together. We share an apartment on the second floor (technically the first floor, but South African culture says otherwise) with an amazing view of the beach. I love waking up to this view every morning. I cook for us frequently, but we all take turns burning things in the kitchen. 

In the first week, we toured the city, started our Global Leadership class, and adrenaline-junkied our way through the Western Cape. I ziplined with a bunch of people on my program I wasn’t able to meet before and I loved it. A girl named Hayden is from San Luis Obispo and goes to Ole Miss and rushed ADPi. Hmm, a California girl goes to the south and rushes adpi. Sound familiar? 
The next day, I jumped out of a plane. I thought it would be more of an adrenaline rush or at least exciting, but it was peaceful. I took a mini nap on the plane ride up there and then the door opened and I jumped out. 10/10 would do it again. 

And here’s my video: Preview YouTube video Tandem skydive of Madison MillerTandem skydive of Madison Miller 
On our second week, we ventured to The Garden Route- the southeastern side of the country with every adventure. We stayed in a cabin with our house mom, Leisl- she was the coolest. Our tour guide, Lourens, was super fun, even if he had to shake me awake on our long bus drives. 
Day 1 was a game drive and saw nature in action. Cheetahs hunting and eating, lions sleeping, elephants socializing, and rhinos trotting. 

The next day we went to an elephant sanctuary and I got to walk with an elephant with her trunk in my hand and then hug her later. This was the highlight of my trip and I cried tears of happiness basically all day. 
On Thursday, I jumped off the world's highest bungee bridge (216m or 709 feet) and I had to jump first. My name was randomly picked out of the hat and alas I was tied to a rope and pushed off. I was so scared but everyone cheered me on, and after the first 3 seconds of complete panic; it was so freeing. I didn’t want to take my harness off so I could go again (this time backwards) but they told me there wasn’t enough time. 
Here’s the link to my photos and video!
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Finally that Friday, I cage dived with a 15 foot shark named Betty and 9 foot shark, Mindy. She was a little shy to come out but once my version of “Benny and the Jets” was sung, she made an appearance. I repeatedly yelled “Betty” but with a snorkel mask on. We were only 10 minutes from shore by boat, which makes me scared to swim in Newport again.

This week, we visited Robben Island where Nelson Mandela was imprisoned for 18 years. We talked to a former inmate who showed us around the compound and shared stories of his time with Mandela. Today, we hiked Table Mountain which was basically a stair stepper for 2 hours. It was so cloudy and foggy but on the top there was pizza and coffee which made it all worth it. 

 
All my love, 
MJ





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Metro Diner: Tuscaloosa, AL

1/15/2021

1 Comment

 
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When I wrote and celebrated my 18th birthday, I had no idea what the world would come to! I celebrated my birthday at school giving out donuts. I got a nose piercing (now covered by my mask) and then went to a Laker Game at a sold out Staples Center. Could you imagine that now? 
I can’t wait to celebrate my 19th with all my college friends and back in my second favorite city (LA you still have my heart, and good weather)

Now, here are 19 more things I am excited for and some goals I have!
  1. Making new memories!
    My Private story (it’s called A 3 but I’m funny) has really seen it all and some of the viewers have lived it all. These are the stories I am racking up that I’ll tell my kids one day and they’re making up for all the times I stayed in bed instead of going out in high school. 
  2. Meeting new people!
    Maybe it’s my bad memory, but I feel like I meet new people everyday. Sometimes the conversations are a simple “hi!” while in the meal line at the House, and sometimes twenty minute conversations with someone I met in the quad. 
  3. A job!
    I’m one of those people that thrive on being busy. If I have a 5 hour break in the day, I’ll spend it napping or on my phone. When I have a shift later, or chapter, or a big test, every minute is important and I can’t waste it on TikTok. I’m not getting a job for the money, albeit it is a nice bonus. I wanted a job to get out and meet more people, put something on my resume/have experience, and start feeling more like a “Big Girl”
  4. Writing more!
    It’s been a hot minute, but I am hoping to bring you guys new reviews at least once a month. As always, feel free to send me your own butter reviews (it literally makes my day) or request a place using the recommend tab! I still have my writing position at Her Campus. 
    1. NEWSLETTER
      1. ​https://hercampus.us17.list-manage.com/subscribe?u=fa7db6029185ab45f5ba7c741&id=a16f5275d5 
    2. APPLY
      1. https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfg9WacEowZLJ8C-rV_uDpm27rYqIxV6O2xzSdi9HG8-zfcCQ/viewform
  5. To stop taking bullshit from everyone!
    First semester, I let people use me as a doormat, and that has to stop. I wasn’t good with setting boundaries for fear of hurting their feelings or having them think I didn’t care. Well, fuck that. I am happy to be a shoulder to cry on, and give you advice, and I’ll be there for you, but I can not be your 24/7 therapist especially if you don’t take my advice. I have to start speaking out on things that bother me  instead of letting them harbor inside before it explodes and the aftermath becomes too much. I have to be clear with what I’m okay and not okay with because the fine line of silence is not a safe place to be. 
  6. Saying “Roll Tide” more than ever
    The joy that comes from hearing “roll tide” anywhere at any time is indescribable. Alumni have come up to me telling me their stories from school, and some prospective students have asked for some advice. With our 18th championship, and our good basketball team, I’ve been hearing it a lot- and loving it. 
  7. We Live For Each Other Wednesdays
    “We Live For Each Other” is the motto of the Alpha Delta Pi sorority and every Wednesday we post to prove it. Sisterhood is so real in this chapter and I count my diamonds everyday that I am an Eta. By the way, I’m the assistant finance chair and sisters there’s a bill due today!!!!
  8. Taking care of myself 
    When I was back home for the break, I found it so easy to push things aside and save everything for later. While a mental break is good every now and then, it becomes a problem when the only thing you do is nothing at all. At school, I walk 4 miles everyday to and fro the sorority house, class, friend’s dorms, and it was so easy to be sedentary at home. I also wanted to eat everything that I missed for the 15 weeks I was gone-- Import’s Pizza, In n Out, sushi, my dad's pasta and my mom’s grilled cheeses. I weirdly missed the house Brussel sprouts and my favorite Alabama salads. It is annoying how much better I feel when I do more than lay in bed and eat chips all day, and how much better my skin looks when I wash it daily and actually do that whole skincare routine Hiram has been talking about. 
  9. Embracing my Jewishness
    In middle school we read “The Diary of Anne Frank” and when I explained that I was Jewish and what the holocaust meant to me, the boy behind me, whispered “I guess they missed you.” Since then, I hid it and only told my friends. When I arrived at school in the south, I was really worried about the anti-semitism I might face, and I had never been more happy to be wrong. Everyone thought it was really cool that I was Jewish and when Hanukkah rolled around, I was filled with warm messages, and my friends were asking me about the history of Hanukkah. I used to be so afraid of backlash if I spoke up about semitic things-ya know like Neo Nazis storming the capitol with shirts reading “Camp Auschwitz” and “6MWE” (6 million wasn’t enough). I have to get over my fears and realize that being Jewish is part of who I am and I have to embrace it. 
  10. Rebuilding my wallet
    In the excitement of celebrating the National Championship win on the Tuscaloosa Strip, my wallet fell out with my Driver’s License, cash for my birthday, another ID ;) and of course I lost my wallet itself. It was definitely a slap in the face and a lesson in responsibility. 
  11.  Travelling
    While it is not safe to travel now, I can’t wait to explore more once the world opens up again! I’m planning to save up for a summer abroad. 
  12.  Going to Class!
    January 13th marked the first day of second semester, and it is already off to a good start for me. I changed my major to News Media/Journalism (lol remember when I was Pre-Med) and I like all my classes. College is already a big financial and time commitment, it wasn’t worth it for me to spend time and money on classes that I didn’t enjoy or where I cried everyday. 
  13.  Keeping my room clean
    Next semester, I’ll be sharing a room for the first time in 19 years. I can be pretty messy, but I’m not dirty. Like I have clothes on the floor and an unmade bed, not rotten food sitting in my garbage can. Even in my private suite, I’ve been trying to keep it cleaner as more friends are seeing it.      
  14.  Late Nights
    Some of my favorite memories are walking back from Waffle House at 4 a.m. or having movie marathons until the sun comes up. I do like my sleep, but I can’t catch up on memories with my friends. 
  15.   Trying new things
    I find myself staying in my comfort zone in a lot of aspects of life. I go out with the same people to the same places, and while I love that, I want to adventure more! I don’t have to do some over the top thing to feel like I’m reaching this goal- it could be something as small as ordering something new at a restaurant or switching up my routine at the gym. 
  16.  Taking a lot more pictures and videos
    At the end of the semester, I wanted to do a first semester recap/photo dump, and I felt like I had posted everything already! 
  17.  Keeping up with current events
    It’s easy to tune out the news and stop doom scrolling, but then I find myself uneducated on topics that I should definitely be educated on. If I want to be on the news one day, I should probably actually pay attention to it. 
  18. Spending less time on technology
    Even with the blue light glasses, I get headaches from being on my phone and computer all the time. I should figure out how to entertain myself without my phone. 
  19. Enjoying 19!
    19 is the legal age in Alabama which means I can do so much more! I really have been enjoying my life and all the ups and downs that come with it, and I can not wait to see what 19 brings! 

The butter itself

Creaminess- 2/5 Very thick and stuck to my mouth
Saltiness- 2/5 distinct butter taste
Spread- 5/5
Softness- 4/5
13/20



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Waffle House Tuscaloosa, AL

10/18/2020

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Hi everyone! I have missed you so much! I hope you are all enjoying college, your last year of high school, or just life in general! I thought I would fill you in on everything I’ve done these past few weeks!
  1. I joined a sorority! 
    Alpha Delta Pi has my whole heart 
  2. I have cried a lot.......
    In my bed, at my sorority house, in the bathroom, just everywhere on campus
  3. I spent $8 on laundry once
    It's the 4 washers and 3 dryers for me
  4. I got a 2/10 on a take home chem quiz
    I googled every answer and still made a 20%
  5. I walked 11 miles on Game day in heeled booties #regertz
    However I average about 5 everyday
  6. I published 3 articles with HerCampus Bama. Check ‘em out!
  7. Tested positive for strep, but negative for Ms. Rona (I’ve been tested 6 times now!)
  8. Met a bunch of girls from California and a girl who went to the neighboring high school!
  9. Became a sports fanatic
    It’s easy to love football when the Tide crushes it every Saturday. Also the hometown pride is strong with the Lakers’ 17th National Championship and the Dodgers’ 11 runs in one inning. 
  10. Realized I only have 5 personality traits
    Being from Los Angeles, being in a sorority, failing chem, being able to do the dolphin from Tik Tok, and liking Taylor Swift. 

I hope I can keep y’all updated more, and let you know about all the great butter I eat down here. I want to hear about your lives too, so please reach out!

I
 had my first experience at Waffle House at 3:30am, and let me tell you, it hits diff. 

Saltiness- salty but with a kick of sweetness: 4/5
Softness- like pillows: 5/5
Creaminess- it didn’t really stick in my mouth: 2/5
Spreadability- Since it is a waffle, it's not very smooth, but I could tell that it would be okay: 3/5

Total: 14/20 +2 for the vibes
16/20







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Dish, La canada, ca

6/25/2020

1 Comment

 
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Hello Friends! I have certainly missed writing about butter, and receiving your reviews from various places! It’s been hard for me to write, because I don’t have anything to write about. I almost thought about writing about all the things I did during my coronacation, but I don’t know how interesting running up and down the block with my obese dog and then taking a 5 hour nap is to my readers. I made shrinky dinks, I had a socially distanced lunch with my friends. I tried a couple workouts and hated them, and apparently learning new Tik Tok dances does not count as a workout according to my Apple Watch.I ate a lot of home cooked food, which if you know anything about me, is quite a rarity. I got tested for coronavirus twice (both times horrible!) The start of quarantine would’ve been the perfect time to post as people were starving for new content, but God bless Netflix for giving us John B. 

   Sidenote: WHY is he John B? There is no other John. Why does Sarah Cameron say it obsessively? See: “Relax John B, It's not like I haven’t seen a boy in underwear before. I have a brother, get your head out of the gutter, John B.” Why are her siblings named Rafe and Wheezy? Why does no one care about Pope’s scholarship? Why is he named Pope? It is too close to Pogue, and was confusing to me for the first three episodes. Did they really think they would be able to get the gold off of that scary old lady/axe murder’s property? It’s theft and trespassing! I have more questions and comments that I am willing to discuss with anyone! 

Just when I thought I was ready to write, George Floyd was murdered over $20- sparking protests and calls to reform and action. Then I didn’t know what to say. I support the Black Lives Matter movement, and think that everyday is a good day (okay actually three months ago was the perfect day) to arrest the cops that killed Breonna Taylor, but it’s been hard to find out who doesn’t align with my same opinions. In high school, I kept my mouth shut about politics, I found myself uneducated enough on the topic, too shy to ever speak up, too worried about being “nice” to want to step on anyone’s opinions, and too sensitive if the argument ever got too heated. Now that I’m entering college (IN 42 DAYS), I realize that won’t fly anymore. I’m actually super liberal, and I am worried about going to such a red state. I defended my decision to go to such a conservative state because I wanted a winning football team, southern charm, and a good fried chicken- not because I aligned with the politics. I realize now I cannot just sit back and let the water run off my feathers. I have to be vocally anti-racist and anti-homophobic because even though racism and homophobia don’t affect me directly, they affect my friends, my teachers, my classmates, the other people I share this beautiful Earth with, and I cannot sit idly by. To quote every white girl's Instagram in the past few weeks, “I understand that I will never understand, but I stand.”


I am confident that I can weather the storm. Since everyone has been posting petitions (sign some down below), and support for the movement, I can see that maybe I was wrong about those who go to Alabama. I have seen more posts in support of BLM and Pride Month from my future sorority sisters, classmates, peers, running partners, than I have from the people I went to elementary school with in blue California. I knew this about my little suburb because when my mom was trying to get me to go to another school, I defended Alabama by saying “I already go to school with rich white republicans and Trump supporters- I’m fine. Bring it on and Roll Tide.” I am pretty positive that I will find my people, help someone else understand my perspective, and see more clearly to others who are different than me. 

Something I will never understand? People who do not wear masks in public! Aside from protecting yourself and others and slowing the spread of Coronavirus- masks are the BEST disguise for when you run into someone you know from your small town! Add some sunglasses and a hat? No one will even know who you are. 

IN CONCLUSION: 
Wear a mask
Sign some petitions 
Buy some Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream
Be Kind to one another- we could use more kindness in the world
Enjoy your final days before the wild ride that is college!



Butter Review from Dish- the last restaurant I went to before the world shut down

Creamines- 2/5- it stuck to the roof of my mouth, and it just wasn’t it sis
Saltiness-0/5 it tasted like straight up fat
Softness- 3/5
Spread- 3/5

JUSTICE FOR BREONNA TAYLOR
REMOVE CONFEDERATE MONUMENTS ON ALABAMA’S CAMPUS
MAKE JUNETEENTH A NATIONAL HOLIDAY
DISALLOW TRUMP’S NEW RULE TO DENY CARE BASED ON LGBT STATUS
ANTI-RACIST EDUCATION IN LA CANADA SCHOOLS





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Driftwood Kitchen Laguna Beach, CA

1/15/2020

1 Comment

 
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18 things I learned in 18 years

  1. That it will all eventually be okay 
  2. 4 quarters > 100 pennies 
    • I used to be obsessed with being friends with everyone and collecting clout (cringe I know). In that time, I missed out on some quality time with my TEAM ;)
  3. People are only going to like you for you 
    • Starting to look for roommates, major buddies (child psychology majors wya?!) and beginning the rush process is freaking hard and scary! It’s even scarier when you are trying to keep up a character that’s not you 
  4. Asking questions is Okay 
    • Shoutout to my AP Statistics teacher Jessica Quinn for letting me ask her many many questions (it’s a stats joke, okay!). I used to be embarrassed of asking questions but then I’d fail the test and that was way more embarrassing.
  5. The opinions of people who don’t know you or don’t care about you- don’t matter 
  6. 10 deep breaths saves lives 
    • Mom yelling at you? 10 deep breaths 
    • You have to cross over 5 lanes of the freeway? 10 deep breaths 
    • Nose and Helix piercing? 10 deep breaths 
  7. It’s nice to be important, but it’s more important to be nice  
  8. See the good in people
  9. ROLL TIDE 
    • I'm so happy that I’m attending the University of Alabama next year, I really am but dealing with the myopia of college rankings at LC really sucks. I don’t have to explain myself every time I tell someone where I’m going. If their response is contemptuous haha oh well! Roll Tide 
  10. Never miss an opportunity to tell someone how happy you are that they are in your life 
  11. Babies are really cute, but not right now 
    1. Unfortunately, I should probably graduate from high school, college, AND have a job before I decide to take care of a tiny human 
  12. Punctuality is not a trait I possess, but I am working on it everyday
    • Sorry Ms. Leu 
  13. I really do feel better when I eat veggies and have real dinner and going on a run than when I lay in bed eating chips and cookies 
  14. Blondes really do have more fun! 
  15. I lost 45 pounds this year, and it didn’t solve all of my problems...
    • I was really self conscious when I was heavier, but I’m still self conscious- just about different things. I don’t know how to explain it, but I feel like people are noticing me more, being nicer to me, now that I’m skinnier and that kinda makes me feel sad? I don’t know, it’s like I told myself that it’s what's on the inside that counts (AND THAT’S TRUE), but I have certainly been treated differently since the transformation. 
  16. Trust yourself
  17. Its okay to be vulnerable- and you should be!
    • Shout out to all those people that reached out to me after my mental health post a few months ago. I was scared to write that, but because of you- it really paid off!
  18. It’s just the beginning!
    • Oh how I wonder how the rest of my adulthood will turn out (hopefully really well)

Thanks for all the birthday wishes!

Rating 

Creaminess- 4/5 dense but also airy 
Softness- 4/5 soft and melts in your mouth
Saltiness- 3/5 it was caramelized maple butter, but kinda tasted like bacon?? 
Spread- 5/5, it was partially melted tho


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Waysider, Tuscaloosa, Alabama

12/30/2019

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In a couple of days, the decade in which I lived most of my conscious life will come to an end. As much as I have thoroughly enjoyed saying “see you next decade” to the teachers of whose final I just failed, I never really let it sink in that another 10 years of my life is about to start. A decade where I’ll be 2,025 miles away from home living with three girls who are not my two sisters and mom. A decade in which I may meet my husband (lol cute) or have my children (still debating between having 4 or 6, let me know). A decade where maybe I’ll become a little easier on myself and more forgiving with my past, my mistakes, the person I have become. A decade in which I will become an adult (in 16 days!) and figure out how to live my life without calling my mom from my bed to bring me water. 

I hope in 2020 colleges will be fighting over who gets the privilege to have you as a student (and then subsequently the search for roommates as amazing as mine), lots of good butter, and happiness. In the next decade, let’s learn to be nicer, more patient, and more forgiving to ourselves and others. 

Happy New Year and Roll Tide! 

Love, 
Mudge 

This review comes from the Waysider in Tuscaloosa, AL. A cute little breakfast stop filled with families of every generation, former students coming home to see the Tide crush its opponents, and current students making memories that they will then tell their children about in the same restaurant when they come home. Also, I would be lying if I didn’t think it was a sign from God Nick Saban that The Waysider gave me a large bowl of butter without even asking, and one of the reasons Bama passed the vibe check. 

Creaminess- 4/5: Very Dense 
Saltiness- 3/5: At first, it had that very distinct butter taste and was not salty until the end
Softness- 5/5: Super soft and did not disrupt the softness of the biscuit
Spreadability- 4/5

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Tommy Bahama Restaurant Newport Beach, CA

10/16/2019

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I have a confession: I still play. 

Not like with dolls, and dress up costumes, but with writing stories on my computer. I create little worlds, alter egos, characters, lives, deaths, and everything in between. 

I write stories about my life through an alter ego named Sloane Taylor. She is outgoing, confident, formidable, and tender. She charms everyone she meets with her quick wit or funny one liners. She is not afraid to call out those who deserve it. Sloane Taylor is quite the opposite of MJ Miller. 

I created Sloane Taylor after “WWBD? Or What Would Beyonce Do?” started trending my Freshman year. I do not know what Beyonce would do under the stress of 3 AP classes or the worry of a class presentation. Beyonce is probably not worried about impressing 35 teenagers with a slideshow about motifs in To Kill a Mockingbird, but MJ Miller is. Beyonce didn’t seem relatable to me, but Sloane Taylor did. Sloane Taylor was able to be molded to my life, my situations, to what I wanted to be in life. 

I think my mom is suspicious about my playing, and still thinks I play. She isn’t wrong, but the reasons I do it are not the ones she’s thinking of, most likely. I play as a coping mechanism. 
So when I do my complicated math homework, I do it as Sloane Taylor, because Sloane Taylor doesn’t struggle through basic trigonometry. I walk around school as Sloane because Sloane Taylor rules the halls. MJ Miller’s anxiety makes her want to crawl into a hole when she arrives on campus, for fear of one person not liking her. Sloane Taylor would tell someone to shove it if they said something mean about her. MJ Miller would internalize it. 

MJ Miller ran to the bathroom Sophomore year in tears when she was called to the board to do a math problem- that was to her- undoable. Sloane Taylor tried her best, laughed it off, and sat back down- perfectly fine. Senior year MJ Miller admits to not knowing the answer, and being perfectly fine with it. 

When MJ Miller bakes cookies for herself and friends, they somehow seem to disappear with each person who asks. People who probably don’t even know my name, or know me as anything but cookie girl. Sloane Taylor bakes cookies, and will tell people that they can not have a cookie. She uses her influence and power to be The Sloane Taylor not cookie girl.

Eventually Sloane Taylor slipped into me, and now there’s more cookies for me and my friends, not for the kid in my chemistry class that will probably not remember my kindness. 

Sloane spends her time at hospitals brightening children’s days and is the president of her debutante program. I also spend time at children's hospitals and was a few votes short of becoming the president, but Sloane just does it better. Sloane is just better. The world is run by Sloane, and she knows it. 

I said I used Sloane Taylor as a coping mechanism to get through the mundane, scary parts of high school. I used Sloane as the person I wanted to be and become over the course of four years. Sometimes I took her on to get a little confidence boost with teachers, class presentations, or even meeting new people. I used Sloane’s no care attitude to brush off hurtful comments, positions I lost in student government, or just not to care so much about the opinions of people who don’t know me or care about me. Maybe MJ Miller was Sloane Taylor all along, and she just didn’t know it yet. 

Creaminess: 4/5 
- very airy 

Saltiness: 2/5
- it was nutmeg flavored but complimented the bread well
- okay it was just like a lot of nutmeg

Softness: 4/5
- Very Soft 

Spreadability: 4/5
- The hot bread made it easy to spread, but I think it would be spreadable anyway

14/20- I would say one of the most accurate scores I have given. 
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Gerard's Restaurant, Maui, HI

9/15/2019

1 Comment

 
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Do you remember in elementary school, you would lean back in a chair on one leg, waiting to see if you would fall backwards? That is what it feels like to get out of bed every day for me. Just on the edge, ready to tip, my heart and soul in my stomach.

I am really really sad. I feel like for the past month, I’m just an empty human being. The only thing I could do was lay in bed feeling completely hollow. I don’t think I'm naturally a sad person, I think I’m the polar opposite. I think my smile is my only redeeming quality, and I feel like if I were a Pantone color it would be a sunny yellow color (maybe a buttery yellow color). The worst part is that I have no reason as to why I’m so sad. I have no reason to be sad. My dad’s cancer is gone, my mom and I aren’t fighting, my friends have never felt more in my life, my classes are interesting and fun, Taylor Swift and Lana Del Rey released killer albums, and my life is going really well! But I’m just really really sad. 

I think I'm so broken all the King's horses and all the King's men couldn't put me together again.

I used to only cry from laughing too hard, and now I have cried everyday over nothing, I just can’t stop crying. I love to go running, but I’ve been so blue that I can’t find the will to go to the Rosebowl. I don’t know if I’m sad over the fact that this is my last year in little LC, my SAT scores (that somehow went down?), my life teeming with minor inconveniences, I don’t know what it is!

I normally try and find an ending to the blurbs before the review that leaves the reader with a sense of completeness.I want to earn the privilege of their time because there never seems to be enough hours in the day, and who would want to spend some of their limited time reading a butter blog? I think the fact that I can’t find an ending to this post, is because I don’t really know what to say, because I don’t know what I’m feeling. 

Butter Review:

This “salted European butter” from Gerard’s in Maui really did not live up to its name. 

Creaminess- 2/5 
  • Very Dense like my Psychology textbook
Softness- 3/5
Saltiness- 0/5
  • It tasted like butter? 
Spread- 2/5

Bonus point for butter dish +1

8/20 ​



1 Comment

Kimo's- Lahaina, Maui, HI

8/5/2019

0 Comments

 
Picture

Almost every day I run 5 miles. This past week, I've been lucky enough to run along the Hawaiian coastline and see turtles float in the ocean, occasionally coming up for air. It certainly has been a better view than the La Canada horse trails or the Rose Bowl track. 

It got me thinking about why I run. When I was younger, I used to think that I could run away from all my problems, if I just ran fast enough. If I just turn up Jay Z's The Black Album loud enough I can run from the mean girls, the harsh teachers, the homework I don't understand, the monsters under my bed, and the painful thoughts roaming in my head. If I just go one more mile, another lap, I will have fully cleared my mind from all the things that made me want to run away in the first place. Or so I'd like to think. The thing is, is that running away from your problems does nothing make them follow you, and grow larger. Maybe I should take a note from the sea turtles, if the ocean gets to be too much, pop your head out and breathe. 

Butter Review
Softness- 4/5: Soft like the waves lapping on shore
Creaminess- 4/5: Light and airy like the ocean breeze
Saltiness-5/5: Perfectly salty like the seawater
Spreadability-5/5: Spreads out like sails in the wind

Total: 18/20
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